Thursday, August 15, 2013

Have You Truly Made Your Amends?

I have lived with regrets and hurt other people and while my past no longer controls who I am, there is accountabilities that follow through every injury. Anger is masked through hurt and when you steal a child's identity for selfish reasons in sobriety they are going to experience injustice and loss of what happened to their childhood. A great deal of emotional abuse is covered with alcohol and substances, but when we rise above those numbing factors, reality is still there in their minds. 
     
       Never excuse your behavior and there are times we have to listen to those that we have robbed and cheated, even when it sounds angry.  This is a part of the healing process and if you are not ready to deal with those issues then you are not equipped to deal with your past or your accountability over the damage that was done.  I pray for those that are not willing to understand or be honest.

      While we know that we are supposed to honor our father and mother, very close to that passage it also states that Father's do not provoke your son's to wrath. When dealing with these situations; until there is a breakthrough there is not one that can demand respect when they are not fully facing the damage of the hurt. Part of our accountability is taking responsibility over what we have done, and it doesn't mean disregarding those that we have harmed or playing it off. This will only accumulate more rage and resentment.  Those that show no remorse for damaging one’s life have not faced the truth. They need help to come to terms with what their actions have caused. Anger is DANGER when left to itself.

      Most of what someone wants is honesty, and an understanding of what was done to them. It is much easier for forgiveness to happen this way in families and relationships.   Children respect protection from their parents, and when protection  has been severed throughout their lives, rage builds and confusion over what happened to them is overwhelming. This happens many times in sexual abuse cases, as well as a parent that has continued to use drugs with their child.   Injustice creates anger and feelings that were stolen from them in innocence.   Every child wishes they could do what they want but in reality they grow up, and if they are allowed to destroy themselves with a parent's consent or participation, they later realize how much protection they truly needed while wondering how this could happen to them. We were never meant to be our children's friends, or include them in situations that could ruin their lives, or even kill them.   

     There are many unanswered questions of why they were violated, and blame that person when they become addicted to sex or drugs. This is a horrible battle of one moving through this in their recovery process, and is a step towards healing. It is a long road to acceptance, and learning to forgive those that hurt us unjustly.   Anger is part of it, and families that wish to make amends cannot do this without accountability for their actions. There is no covering or mask that God does not witness, and while many people seek God while searching for answers, this one thing cannot be skipped over. The injury has to heal and sometimes if there is no accountability, the person must deal with that anger alone. Through the process of forgiveness and restoration we must look to God, even when others fail us or remain to stay as they are. We have no control and in our healing we have to give that anger over to God or we self-destruct. Some things are too hard for us alone, but with God all things are possible. Prayers!

      Denial is spiritual blindness that leads to deception.  If you walk in spiritual blindness, you will never be able to see where you are going, or clearly hear God’s voice in your life.  This is not a blame game, or a post to trample anyone with condemnation; it is a heart cry for the innocence lost.  I will speak up for those that cannot speak, and my words will trust in the Holy Spirit to heal and restore brokenness.  My prayers will flood like a river into the utter most parts of those secret places where there is no voice.   It is for a little girl and boy that have carried this burden for way to long.  It is for the man or woman that cannot face up to their wrongs.   I pray transformation and reconciliation into the process of healing and recovery.  May God guide you and be with you on a journey towards freedom and restoration.  There is nothing that cannot be forgiven, but every stone will be turned over and no secret will be covered.

       God is whom I fear and I will not be moved.  We have all fallen short, and this journey is impossible to walk alone when chains are bound to our souls.  Any family that is going through these trials, there is no healing that can take place until we are able to own up to the damages we have done towards others.  I pray you will make a choice of accountability.   You owe it to yourself and also to your loved ones.  May God guide you in your decision to break the yoke of deception.   I pray that you will take that step. 

 

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