Emotional Effects of Divorce on Children

Emotional Effects of Divorce on Children

          There are millions of children every year that suffer from the emotional effects of divorce.  According to Baer, Hoffman & Mooney (2007) approximately 40 percent of marriages will end in divorce, and most divorces happen before children reach their eighteenth birthday.   Most parents facing divorce want to protect their children, but often times avoiding the issue can add to their levels of stress. (Debord, K., 1994).  Debord explains that it can be frightening for children, and although it may be hard for parents to explain; children need to be encouraged and parents need to help children adapt to their new life changing environment.  Children are suddenly forced to face the reality that everything in their life is going to be different.  One of the greatest fears of children is change. (Debord, K., 1994).  Children can also experience developmental issues with attachment, and fear of abandonment.  Research will show that divorce does not just affect children’s lives for a few years, but can follow them throughout their lives (Debord, K., 1994).

     Children are faced with the loss of attachment, which can lead to self-blame in the early years of childhood, and they can also experience the fear of losing the other parent and who will take care of them. (Debord, K., 1994)  Debord gives examples of children and different stressors that are created in separate age groups.  These stages are based on the levels of a child’s understanding and perception in their particular age groups.

      Debord clarifies that while infants may not understand the roles of conflict, they can react to the levels of stress that the parent demonstrates which could cause loss of appetite, more spitting up and fussiness.  A toddler can understand that a parent is no longer in the home, but does not have the cognitive abilities to understand why.  This can cause the child to be clingy, insecure and not be able to rest well.  They may experience anger and not understand why they are mad, and toddlers have a fear of both parents being absent (Debord, K., 1994).

       Preschool children do not have the cognitive abilities to understand what divorce or separation means.  They know that one parent is no longer active as before, and this can cause uncertainty and the preschooler may resort to self-blame.  Nightmares can also occur during the process and grief over the loss of the parent no longer in the home. (Debord, K., 1994).

       Early elementary age children are aware of divorce, and that parents may not have the love they once did.  They may experience feelings of deception, and has hopes that parents will reconcile.  Early elementary age children experience feelings of rejection of the absent parent.  They may also experience stomach problems along with headaches.  They definitely fear what will become of their future (Debord, K., 1994).

     Preteen and adolescents are able to understand a divorce, but can be very unaccepting of it.  They can become disillusioned, experience anger, and also feel abandonment from the absent parent (Debord, K., 1994).  Preteens will try to take advantage of stress levels of both parents.  They can also appeal to take over the household, and this is a time period where drugs may evolve, because of the stresses caused from the divorce.  Suddenly they may feel as if they have to mature to fast, and they also experience great stress of what the future will hold for them concerning college and financial aspects that could affect them.  They may also have great concerns over their own relationships, and whether they can attain long term commitments. (Debord, K., 1994).

     According to Fagan &Churchhill (2012) “Divorce causes irreparable harm to all involved, but most especially the children.” (p.1). Culture has certainly changed over the past few generations, because what was once conceived as a tragedy can often be considered a celebration when partners choose to divorce now. (Fagan & Churchhill, 2012).   This is a sad occurrence because according to Fagan & Churchhill “it diminishes children’s future competence in all five of society’s major tasks or institutions:  family, school, religion, marketplace and government” (p.1).  There is no way we can accurately predict what will happen to a child that experiences divorce, but research has shown that the limits of divorced children are lowered because of it, and the effects are high in number and are serious(Fagan & Churchhill, 2012).  According to Fagan &Churchhill (2012), these are determinable concerns about divorce and the effects on children. 

            1.)  Religious practice:  Divorce diminishes the frequency of worship of God

            and recourse to Him in prayer.  2.) Education:  Divorce diminishes children’s

            learning capacity and educational attainment.  3.) The marketplace:  Divorce

            reduces household income and deeply cuts individual earning capacity.

            4.) Government:  Divorce significantly increases crime, abuse and neglect, drug

            use, and the costs of compensating government services.  5.) Health and well

            being:  Divorce weakens children’s health and longevity.  It also increases

            behavioral, emotional, and psychiatric risks, including even suicide.

     Fagan & Churchhill (2012) further conclude that while parents are dealing with two sets of problems during the divorce that children’s support is extremely lower, than those of parents that live together.  They receive less emotional support, and this weakens the parent child relationship.  It can be harder for the child to fully trust the parent after a divorce occurs. (Fagan & Churchhill, 2012).  Final statements that have been addressed by Fagan & Churchhill are the children’s view of divorce.

              “Regardless of age, children of divorce deeply resent the strains and difficulties

             which arise in long-held family celebrations, traditions, daily rituals, and special

            times, and rate these changes as major losses.

     It seems obvious that divorce is going to take a toll, even when children have positive peers to encourage them.  This will lessen the degree of stress, but some of the losses that come from divorce cannot be replaced, and unfortunately this can carry on throughout the life of the child into adulthood.  It is apparent that divorce has caused collateral damages to our culture and society.  When looking at the statistics of divorce and thinking of the aspects of children; it becomes clearer of the present condition of what is being faced in the next generation as the numbers increase. 

     Sometimes divorce is necessary if a child’s welfare is in danger, or if there is domestic violence involved, but the transition can still be hurtful and misunderstood by separation.  It is very complex when parents make the child choose whom they can love.  It can be damaging when parents use the children as weapons against the other one.  In the state of Texas before divorce can be granted each party is required to take a course on how to remain civil in the areas of interest focused upon the child.  The author would hope to see requirements that would involve unique counseling to address issues related to the children, before granting divorce.

     While partners may have someone to represent them during a divorce, many times children have no outlet or voice.  This leaves them vulnerable to all the things discussed above. 

According to Mathews D. Wayne (n.r.) there are short term effects as well as long term effects.  A great deal of what a child must go through depends upon the parent’s ability to deal with their anger towards one another, and to maintain the parenting role.  It is important that the absent parent is able to establish a satisfying part that is mutually acceptable with the children, or child.  It is imperative that children of divorce have a healthy and trusting outlet to address things that take place in their lives.  If the problems of divorce continue in anger and discontent, usually the child is the victim of an occurrence he was not responsible for. (Matthews, D. Wayne).  There is no escape of harm that will affect a child through divorce, but there are ways that children can begin their own personal healing and grief of the loss.  More focus in the court systems should address the implications of stress that comes from divorce, but too often children are overlooked, and they are left with long lasting effects that will be carried out in their adult lives, and the patterns will be repeated.  Divorce does not only hurt the emotional wellbeing of a child, but it breaks down the strength of a family unit throughout the country, which has a negative impact of our society as a whole.

     Parents should know that not all the negative effects will occur mentioned in this paper, but in the case of a child in distress and going through a crisis because of divorce, parents should be responsible to help their child get through the transition.  Sensitivity to a child is critical during this period according to (Foulkes, L., 2001).  The emotional state of a child should be a primary concern, and the child should never be left to themselves to absorb the stress of divorce alone.  This will have a serious impact on the child depending upon their support system, and if there problems are being addressed.  Children need the continuing reassurance that they are loved by both parents and it is important for healthy relationships between them to continue, in spite of the situation of the adults.  The author would hope that more emphasis would be placed upon the stress of what children are going through, because in the long run, they are the ones that will suffer the most from adult decisions.  The conclusions of the arguments would be that divorce is far more crucial to the wellbeing of a child, and parents need to know the emotional implications of what can become of their children, in the process of their decision making alternatives.  If investments are made in families, counseling should be an option that promotes reconciliation if that is possible.  Adults do not always consider the implications of what can come from impulsive decisions.  Children are worth an effort, and if counseling does not prove successful, parents need to be fully aware of the emotional upheaval that happens to children.  Again, the court system can address these problems if they are brought to the table, but it takes awareness and concern for the emotional welfare of children.  Children are the future, and they deserve to grow up physically and emotionally stable.  There are things that can be done.  Churches can take part in counseling families, and leading them towards reconciliation.  Until our entire society sees the problem, the emotional effects of divorce will not improve.      

           

                                                           References

Baer, T., Hoffman, M., & Mooney, N. (2000). The Effects of Divorce on Children

Debord, K., (1994).The Effects of Divorce on Children

     Focus on the Kids, North Carolina Cooperative Extention Service

Fagan, P., &Churchill, A. (2012).  The Effects of Divorce on Children.

     Marriage and Religion Research Institute

Foulkes, L. (2001).  The Effects of Divorce on Children

     Clinical Psychology Associates of North Central Florida, P.A.

Matthews, W.D. (2012). Long –term Effects of Divorce on Children

                                               

 

The lies behind the mask of addiction and how the health system plays into it.

     This subject can be very challenging, so the most important things that professionals should address is to make sure that these mental disorders are not mimicking substance abuse or addiction.  Doweiko (2012) explains some of these challenges.  A health care professional needs to be able to know the differences between symptoms of a mental disorder and problems that are occurring because of SUD’s.  He further explains that patients that mention a substance abuse problem will have the same signs as someone that is battling mental illnesses.  Some of the problem areas will be reduced or subside after the person remains clean.  Doweiko (2012), addresses that it can take up to two months to accurately diagnosis someone with dual disorders.   We can be left with a dilemma of a misdiagnosis, if the patient is not willing to admit to SUD problems.  Before diagnosing these problems accurately it is very important, because people can be exposed to medications that they do not need, and also a label of mental illness on their medical record.  Extreme caution should be taken before drawing a conclusion about a dual diagnosis (Doweiko, 2012).

     Anxiety disorder is one that can be mimicked by patients if there is not a correct evaluation made.  Doweiko (2012), again expresses the importance of proper diagnosis to know whether or not the symptoms are from the SUD or the mental disorder.   Doweiko states “one symptom of alcohol syndrome is anxiety” (p. 323).  It is more proper to examine patients for at least three weeks of abstinence before the proper diagnosis can be evaluated correctly.   If the anxiety persists without a substance than most likely the patient will have an anxiety disorder. (Doweiko, 2012).

     Bio polar disorders can also be mimicked if there are signs of amphetamines, alcohol, and cannabis, and manic expressions or depression can follow withdrawal from these compounds.  According to Doweiko “The relationship between the bipolar affective disorders and the SUDs is quite complicated”. (p 325)  He further explains that clinician have an accurate history of the patient in order to determine whether the symptoms worsen or started after the patient began to abuse drugs. (Doweiko, 2012).  It is of the up most importance that a complete work up of mental history is done on the patient.  If a patient has a long history with SUD’s there might not be a way to determine dual diagnosis.  In the case of depression it can be extremely difficult as well, because these problems could be a mask because of the SUD’s. (Doweiko, 2012). 

     If someone goes into outpatient treatment and complains of anxiety and have been using drugs and are not being honest, we face a mis diagnosis of this patient. Could the medical model be giving drugs to people that really do not need them? Could it be a factor of enabling them to self medicate. There is a growing problem of addicts playing the system. I know three of them that do this on a regular basis, and have even laughed about the medication they receive while nothing is being addressed about the real issues of their SUD's. Doweiko (2012) also addressed the mislabeling of someone and having it permenately on their medical records. There are most definitely serious dual diagnosis, but I have to question after finding out the lack of training in the medical model concerning SUD's if we are making to many mistakes. In many of the MHMR clinics people can walk off the street and go in to get a diagnosis and walk out with drugs. There are lots of these patients that are simply wanting to self medicate. I pray that we find a way of getting proper evaluations of these people so we do not become enablers of what we are trying to treat. 
      

     I know this is very important, because I have dealt with addicts, and have seen situations to where they will go into a clinic and fifteen minutes later walk out with a hand full of prescription drugs.   If an addict wants to self-medicate or cannot get their drug of choice, it is becoming a problem of working the system, because a proper diagnosis is not being made.  This is an extreme problem, and according to the research I read this week, it is very clear that proper diagnosis should be made before evaluating a patient and it can take up to several months if there is a substance abuse problem that has been addressed.  The biggest challenge is how to correctly diagnosis someone that is hiding behind there substance abuse problem.  If medical personal are not getting the proper training in this area, how can we be sure we are not self-medicating drug addicts and worsening the problem?  This is a question I ask myself daily, and wonder why changes are not being made.

 References:  Doweiko H. (2012) Concepts of Chemical Dependency Eighth Edition   

 

    

    

Model of Addiction

Models of Addictions

Medical Model of Substance Use Disorders- According to (Doweiko, H.E., 2012) medical model addresses assumptions that there is a possibility of disease, and it further results in biological upheaval. As the environment presents itself, it can trigger genetic factors in theperson that could be inherited. E.M. Jellinek is the majority of the reason that alcohol was accepted as a medical disease. Jellinek addressed alcohol in four different stages. 1)Pre alcoholic stage: known as relief drinking. 2) Prodromal stage: blackouts and guilt overdrinking. 3) self-esteem suffers and social functions are avoided that do not cater to drinking activities. 4) Chronic stage: destruction of morals and tremors. Doweiko (2012).

     Doweiko (2012) further states “there is no single, universally accepted disease model of SUDs. The medical model is loosely associated with numerous theories, and many have suggested that our fate is tied to genetics, but genetic inheritance does not define our behavior. If this were the case there could be no responsibility placed upon the behavior of the abuser. A person s environment and personal experiences can determine whether genetic occurrences will kick in. External forces can be a determining factor as well.

     It may signal relief to place the responsibility of the problem on genetics. We are still in immature stages of being able to evaluate genetics relating to the risks for psychiatric illnesses. According to Doweiko (2012) he further states that it is foundational ignorance that the medical and, psychological professionals speak out about patient’s genetic makeup towards addictions as if there was little hope, as if they were destined to develop a disorder with the lack of knowledge we have about biogenetics. Further critics of the pharmaceutical industry such as (cited Breggin,Peter, 2008; Doweiko, 2012) stated:

Healthcare providers and the general public have been bamboozled by much advertised speculations that brain scans can demonstrate the existence of mental disorders, or even diagnose them. In reality, no psychiatric disorder is demonstrable or diagnosable by brain scan, or by other medical or biological tests.

     Doweiko (2012) further addresses that healthcare persons understanding is that a disorder exists inside an individual. This is a false illusion that is not being represented, and it is allowing for misrepresentation that biological factors redeem excuses for behavior that is unacceptable.   Biology being an excuse by health care professionals. This leaves no accountability or hope for change.

     A personality model of substance use is a theory that there is an addictive personality. According to Doweiko (2012) this arose during the 20^th century in the beginning of psychoanalysis that had to do with hidden trauma that may have caused a person to turn to alcohol or drugs. Doweiko (2012) stated “Psychoanalytic writers hold that individuals used alcohol to numb themselves to emotional pain”. (p. 348) it is considered to be positive reinforcement, pleasure or euphoria, and also helps to deal with bad emotional states.

     Substance Use Disorders: The Final Common Pathway Theory. When using substances there rewards from the drug diminish over time and the increase of the drug is needed to satisfy dopamine levels. If the pleasure grows to boredom other compounds are sought out to increase the euphoric feeling according to Doweiko (2012). Eventually the drugs overwhelm the brains

reward system, and this causes it to fire enormously after using the drug. Disease model seems to be dominate in the United States. There are many insights as stated by Doweiko (2012), but all of these approaches are unable to explain the complexity of SUD adequately.

     While we know there are some biological factors that consist with this viewpoint, there is entirely to much medicating or allowing the person that is addicted to believe they will be this way their entire lives. If we treat based on medical models, everyone with the problem with a mental disorder and substance abuse problem will be treated with psychotropic drugs, which in fact is what is happening today. While I do agree with temporary treatment, medical professionals are not trained in the field of addiction, so this limits them to medicating. The medical model leaves out the hope of change from addiction.

       In AA they address their meetings that I am Jane Do and I am an alcoholic. This however does not mean that Jane will stay in that addictive state, nor does it mean that all people with mental disorders will be inprisoned to that state of occurrence. This medical model is bandaging the problem and not cutting it at the root. There is power in redemption and also hope and change outside of the biological genetic aspect. Most in the profession of psychology have little training on dealing with substance disorders. Now that the prison systems are so full and most of them have substance abuse disorders medical models enslave them with the theories of the disease model. I think our society has suffered greatly in our culture here in the United States because of this. Also the United States is preferenced to the medical model, and over the past years it is not proving it's success.

       I agree that we are in a debate of nature, nurture and spiritual examinations here, and I hope that testing will be done on other groups to determine ways to live a free life and not one that is weighed down in the prison system or meds, because it is creating one of the worst problems within our society. I am not biased to the medical or genetic problems, but the disease model has not proven to be effective on the National level. There is redemptive work that goes to the center of the root, and we do not only have to treat this problem medically, but I believe the problem for many can be cured and that is the path that is hopeful among Celebrate Recovery groups that have had high success rates dealing with addictions.

     To grasp the best of these concepts and use what resources that are available. The United States is biased to the medical model and this is very discouraging, and there is a growing need for substance abuse counselors like never before. Jesus Christ was the greatest of all Cognitive teachers and it is my believe if we follow his model there can be healing of the sick and a cure for addiction. Once again I would like to express I am not ruling out the medical model, but we need to move forward with other ways that could be more helpful that will lead to lasting results.

     Addictions result from the degrading effects of sin on or in creation. This includes the self and the sin of others and the world. The body is in need of redemption. We are not in a glorified state yet, and that leaves us in a vulnerable state to all kinds of things. Full healing can only be found in Jesus Christ and his redemptive work. (Clinton, T. 2005)

References

Clinton, T. (2005) Caring for people God's way; A New Guide for Christian Counseling

 

Doweiko, H.E. (2012) Concepts of Chemical Dependency (8^th Ed.)

 

Substance Abuse Statistics Among College Students are Alarming!

According to (Matics,Greg Feb. 2010) from the Jackson Harold Newspaper article stated the statistics were stunning in the rise of local drug abuse.  (Haskins, Amy) public health educator with the Jackson County Health Department and project director for the Jackson County Anti-Drug Coalition presented statistics of growing drug use.

In the 2009 survey conducted by (Haskins) 21.8 percent of 10^th graders, 33.3 % of high school juniors and 23.3% of high school seniors admitted to drug use.  More alarming was the fact the survey also gave a 10% increase of sixth graders that have begun the cycle of drinking, 11.2 showed tobacco usage and 12% were currently using marijuana.   Haskins further said, “West Virginia has experienced a 550% increase in prescription drug abuse.”  West Virginia residents average some 15 prescriptions each.  These statistics provided a “Take Back Program” disposing of unused prescription drugs is being planned by the Jackson County Anti-Drug Coalition for Year 2 of their grant.  Looking over the statistics, drug usage continues to rise with an extremely high percentage rate of youngsters abusing prescription pills which were astronomical and of huge concern.  The survey helped them acknowledge a severe drug problem within their state and they were able to determine a plan of action by the results.

According to an article published by (Leinwand,Donna; March 2007, USA TODAY) 5.4 million full time college students use drugs and also binge on alcohol at least once a month by a study that was conducted portraying an urgent problem on college campuses around the nation.  The study was released by the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University.  The study found that students had a higher level of drug usage than the general population in the public sector.  22.9 % of students meet the medical condition for alcohol or drug abuse dependence – compulsively abusing substances despite the negative consequences involved, comparing with 8.5% of all people 12 and older.

     The study also included students who admitted to abusing painkillers such as Percocet, Vicodin and OxyContin.  Compared to the survey from 1993 it only rose 1 percent that year and in 2005 it increased to 3.1 percent.  The percentage of the students smoking marijuana heavily jumped from 1.9% in 1993 to 4% in 2005.  Cocaine and heroin rose from 5.4 in 1993 to 8.2 in 2005.  The percentage of students who admitted or reported to binge drinking three or more times during the week rose from 19.7% in 1993 to 22.8% in 2001.  The study found in 2005, 83% of arrests on campus involved alcohol.  These percentages also show a growing increase in drugs and alcohol but the most shocking in this survey was that college students had a higher percentage rating than those that were not attending college 12 and older.  This was a surprising result to me as many people are veiled into believing most drug problems occur with the less fortunate and uneducated.  This should be a wakeup call to college campuses to bring awareness and to try to bring it under control.  This was a national survey so the statistics of college students using drugs and alcohol are very high and should be a concern for the health and safety of the students attending colleges.

References: 

Leinwand, D. (March 15, 2007) College Drug use, binge drinking rise. USA TODAY.

Matics, G. (February 2, 2010) Substance abuse statistics among youngsters alarming. The West Virginia Jackson Herald.

Are we Presenting the Truth or Tradition?

1. What are some ways the Christian gospel is perceived in our culture?

Many people believe in our culture that we can reach God through good works, so primary most people think we can be a good person and do good things. Jesus paid the price for our sins, so no amount of good works can pardon your way into heaven. It is not through good works, but by faith and the good works flow naturally by our belief and love of the Savior. There are many misconceptions that we can confess our belief of the Savior and He will bring abundant prosperity, so in our culture the prosperity gospel can bring deceptions. Jesus said according to (NIV, Matt. 16:24) " If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me".

2. What are some specific moral reasons people may reject the Christian gospel?

One of the main reasons is a sense of pride. Pride blocks change, and that comes along with transformation and sacrifices. In our Western culture we are people that are ruled by self. This is a huge reason many will turn away from the gospel, because they want to live their own way. We live in a generation of quick fixes, and transformation takes time and growth. We want to have it our way, and accepting the gospel means we give our life over to the Savior.

3. What are some specific moral reasons people may reject the Christian gospel?

There is a great deal of confusion within many of our churches. We have to trust and believe in Christ, and not in our religion. I think a great deal of this has to do with tradition that has nothing to do with the word of God. Self righteous attitudes can attribute to the effect of making others feel loved or unworthy. People may be in oppressive bondage, and feel that they are not good enough. This is Satan's greatest lie. Jesus will accept anyone right where they are. Most have a perception that if they are not perfect, God will reject them. They do not understand the gift of salvation, mercy or grace. Most people have not studied on their own, and have also dealt with spiritual abuse. We should never fall into the trap of listening to anyone or anything without examining it with the word of God. It could also possibly be they have been raised in another doctrine their entire lives. It is hard to break free from what you are use to. Again the issue of pride will blind us to search out the truth.

4. What are some specific intellectual reasons people may reject the Christian gospel?

The majority of adults are learning the theories of evolution in universities today. Evolution had flooded the public schools and students are not learning about these things at a young age. They are being taught Darwinism, that ultimately scatches God away from the black board. We fail to examine things for ourselves, or to take the time to examine both sides of the issue. We see social media has taken on this same effect on our children. Astrology, New Age movement, and also atheists have flooded outlets of the younger generation. For the younger generation many will seek to solve their problems through Psychology and other outlets like drug and alcohol. Most people do not understand the power of the Holy Spirit, and how it can direct our lives and shape us into the purposes of God.

5. What can Christians do to address these objections and better communicate the Christian gospel?

Jesus was a friend of sinners. He may have not agreed with their lifestyle but he would listen to them. He primarily could see through to their heart. Loving your neighbor regardless of who they are is a step in the right direction. No one cares about what you have to say, until they can see how much you care. We will not agree with other people all the time. They will not have the same belief system that we do, but we can be a light to them by the way we live our lives through Jesus Christ. We need to understand more, listen more, and learn more about one another instead of judging. If the only friends that we ever acquire are merely Christians, I am not sure how well our ministry will be. We must be the light in the dark places. Our focus should be on Christ first, and he demonstrates the greatest love of all.

References:

The Holy Bible, New International Version Matthew 16:4

The Greatest Paradox of Confusion about the Commision of Christ

Paradox of Confusion about the Commision of Christ

Most people are not taught about the discernment of the Holy Spirit.  Discernment is allowing the Holy Spirit to direct our lives.  There is; however, a huge paradox of confusion at times, because God calls Christians to be set apart and then the scriptures turn around and instruct us to go into the world. 

     Christ knew the hearts of all He came into contact with, because he was the Son of God.  He was all knowing.

     We are called to be in the world, but not of the world.  The night before the death of Christ, He prayed for the will of God over the lives of the disciples in every area of their life.  His prayer was not to take them out of the world, but He wanted them to be protected from the enemy.  It is my belief that we must look at, listen and understand the world in which we live for the sake of advancing God's Kingdom.  It is the calling of us in his plan of redemption.

While avoiding to live as the ways of the world, we are still called to live in it, and to also understand it.  Christians were set apart for stewardship.  Christians are not intended to be locked away and oppressed by fear.  We can easily forfeit our calling if we are living out of the world verses going into it. 

     Temptation is not sin unless it is entertained by our actions.  If we cannot watch television, listen to the radio or read a book without falling into sin, then we should not engage in these things.  If an evil thought enters our minds, and we have rejected that thought then no sin has been committed.  If we; however, take pleasure in preverse thoughts we have fallen into a sinful position.

     We must not allow sinful thoughts to build nests in the process of our thinking. 

 In my closing statement I would like to express that Jesus was tempted in every way imaginable, and yet he did not sin.  Christ promises that we will never be tempted beyond what we are able to bear, and he will not leave us without a way of escape.  In Ephesians 6 we are reminded of the warfare we will battle in the world.  Ephesians 6:13 instructs us to take the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

     We carry a sheild of faith so we are able to quench all the feiry darts of the wicked.  Our final aim is to carry the Sword of the Spirit in all our goings.  We are to go into the world wise as serpants and harmless as doves.  Understanding a fallen world helps us to understand our own purposes in life.  All things work together for good to all those that are called according to his purposes.

Christian Counseling through Discipleship

Christian Counseling through Discipleship

     As the entire country has exploded in the field of Psychology and medicating the mentally ill, there is a huge concern if this approach is the exact one that should be taken alone.  There is a growing concern of prescription drug use, which is in fact simply medicating the problem instead of completely addressing it, so that the disorder can possibly be overcome.  Could this be that God has been taken out of the equation?  In the early field of Psychology there was little focus on the spiritual healing of those that had been abused or terribly hurt by problems, or associated with things that left them incapable of facing on their own.  Still today there is little focus on the spiritual side of Psychology or the profession has little to say about Biblical truths.  In fact, they do not include spiritual healing and restoration in their practices at all in secular Psychology

         It is of great hope that through some of the information generated on three topics on the subject, a clear conclusion can be drawn that could possibly change the course of how the problems have been addressed with those that are spiritual oppressed, tormented by issues of pride, and also the sins of the ancestors that may be also affecting their lives to this day. 

     Psychology is clearly not the enemy, although the precepts have not always led to lasting
results.   There have been many breakthroughs in the development of disorders, and also
cognitive therapies to change behavior patterns.  The problems that are associated with the
outcome are that there has been little room, or attention given for using cognitive therapies,
including spiritual revelations, this had led the profession in a childlike state that cannot heal
mental illnesses.  The fruits of its work alone are not bearing the results that is needed in the dark
world today.     In order to broaden our paths of healing the broken, the definition of truth must
be defined, and there is no other answer that can ever supersede the ultimate understanding and
healing power of Jesus Christ. 

     Society has denied the roots of the problem and it has been left with only a band aid for the cure, and are neglecting the true healing source of redemption and restoration in the lives that are spiraling into a black hole of hopelessness.  Christians and the Churches can no longer afford to not confront these issues.  Christian encourages must press on to be servants in the commission that Christ has called them to be.   

       Neil Anderson addressed many of these issues in his book Discipleship Counseling,
(Anderson, Neil. T., 2003 Discipleship Counseling) Anderson presents a huge amount of
information that is being used among Christian professionals working in the Counseling
profession.  The information is very insightful and gives great hope to the encourager to engage
on some of these areas to help the growing numbers of people that are suffering.

 Helping the Spiritually Oppressed

     According to Anderson (2003), he states “When we lack the expertise and the patience, we resort to some kind of power mode to correct people or circumstances”. (p 173) Anderson raises the question in thoughts of what happens if the lights have been extinguished within the Churches?  He concludes there is great damage that follows this path.  Anderson (2003) states below:

 Pharisaic leaders in such ministries are more concerned about controlling others than about developing self-control.  They do not want to set their people free.  They want to control
 them.  Such people have never really entered into the experience of spiritual life.  They go to church and critique the message and the music.

      Dealing with spiritual bondage will draw persecution and attacks according to Armstrong (2003). Scripture is a reminder to pray for those that are persecuted or cursed.  Some of the self-righteous spirits that are in leadership positions will actually prevent those that are seeking to come to the truth as Anderson (2003) goes on to explain. (p 176).  Legalism is not spirituality.  It is a religious man made tradition, and it can create a huge amount of bondage.  Jesus greatly warned against this in Matthew Chapter 23.  He called them hypocrites that sought to close the doors of the Kingdom that prevented those that needed it the most while turning them away from the truth. (Matthew 23:13).  

  There are many concerns of the spiritually abused also, and this can also create a lack of distrust, and also lead one down a path of complete hopelessness with absolutely no faith at all.   The problems are in every aspect of the world today.  When dealing with a broken spirit it is extremely important to understand the fruits of the spirit, and how to address ourselves to them.    Men and women of God must be led by the power of the Holy Spirit.  This is what will prove our character and it is not of self-effort, but the working of the Spirit that comes through Christ.   Galatians 6:22-25 (NT) but the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith.  Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.   If we live by the Spirit so let us walk by the Spirit.  This gives us the instructions of how we should relate to those when we are encouraging or giving counsel to others.  Anderson stated, “Satan has gained access to people’s lives because of the openings they have given him”.   To give lasting hope to those that are dealing with spiritual oppression, there is a need to be fully prepared for spiritual warfare, and know how to put on the helmet of salvation.  This is the greatest weakness of secular Psychology because these important issues are not addressed.

      According to Diane Langberg (2011) she stated, “You see, trauma does not heal apart from
being spoken and it needs to be heard in the context of a safe relationship where the dignity of
the one who has been crushed is restored”.  (p 3) She concludes that Christian encouragers are to
go, and to patiently listen, be there is the face of the enemy, and do so in love.  Langberg (2011)
spoke no truer words when she addresses the question of “Is not this what Christ did for all”?  To
be Christ like is how love is reflected towards others, even in the very presence of evil. 
He will equip those with the power of his Holy Spirit.

 Overcoming the Issues of Pride

 Pride will always come before a huge fall according to scriptures.  Becoming obsessed with the self-mode will not make the best results in the counseling profession.  Many fail to realize that this very issue is what led to the downfall of Lucifer when he rebelled against God.  Apart from the Holy Spirit, we can do nothing.  Humans are born into pride, because of what happened in the beginning of creation, when Eve wanted to have the equality of God.   Anderson (2003) stated that “hell is where people say, “My will be done.”  Heaven is where we say, “Thy will be done.”  Do you see the exact opposite of the two?  One is totally motivated to self, and the other is governed by the Spirit of God.  So this brings the subject to motive, and why people pursue what they do.  What appears to be a helpful situation could in fact not be at all, if it is being ruled by the spirit of pride.  Anderson (2003) continues to remind others, that helping people should be clothed in kindness and humility towards others.  God is against the proud.   Those that are attended with self-absorption are blind leaders.  Jesus constantly brings to our attention the working of the Spirit.  Those that operate outside of the fruit of the spirit can be deceivers, and full of themselves, so it would be an impossible task for them to encourage others effectively.  The motive is false deception. 

      Anderson (2003) stated that “the more we are able to accomplish by the grace of God, the more susceptible we are to pride. (p 295).  It appears that Anderson is trying to warn others than even in grace, pride will come and sweep Encouragers away if they are led away in boasting, because of our good works.  The works of an Encourager are sacrificial, and they are done under the authority of the Holy Spirit, and nothing that is done in themselves.  We do these things to give glory and honor to the Lord, and not to seek our own gratifications.  It is His working power that gives those the abilities, and the gift of the Spirit to walk beside others in the healing process.  

     Others must have teachable spirits in order to grow in maturity.  Counseling is a muscle, constantly flexing and growing in the process of helping others

Overcoming Ancestral Sins

     Many people are born into dysfunctional families.  Often sins are passed down from one generation to the next according to Anderson (2003).  Anderson also states that “it is the final links of bondage that have chained them to their past”.(p 329) Anderson continues to address the occult experiences in family heritage, and how it has a great influence on what people carry around with them.   He states “Unless we make concerted efforts to do otherwise, we will perpetuate the habits, customs and traditions passed on in our families for generations.” (p 330)

     People develop habits early on, and were not necessarily taught these things.  It is a natural
reaction to pick up things from those related to others.  It can be passed down for several
generations, and many of these contracted habits can be harmful.   Anderson states that “we are
not guilty because of our parents sins.  Yet because they sinned, we are vulnerable to what they
have taught and modeled for us”.

     The Prophets in the Old Testament warned us about the sins of ancestral decent.  According to Anderson (2003) National or corporate repentance cannot happen effectively without individual repentance. (p 335)  If past sins are left to fester, they will be passed down to the next generation.  Anderson (2003) concludes that “it is because we are new creatures in Christ that we can actively choose and renounce the sins of our ancestors and stop the cycle of abuse. (p338)

 It is however not encouraged to introduce this to those in the initial process, unless the Lord brings it to their remembrance.  Encouraging others in Christ is something that should be practiced, and to put on the armor of God to fight the good fight.  Anderson (2003) concludes in his writing that Christ is our defense and we should never let the enemy set the dinner table.  In other words, not to give too much credit on the enemies behalf.  (p 339)  In helping others we want them fully protected under the care and authority of Christ, and that by the grace of God; others can be fully equipped to help break any linkage that imprisons someone because of generational sins or curses.

     According to McMaken, Bonnie (March 2011) almost every family has secret roots that are
embedded in their families.  Sometimes it can be a painful dig to get to the very root of the
problem that sprang from our ancestors.   Generational sins can be hidden very well and are often
swept under the rug to help protect younger generations.  However if the family does not possess
the proper knowledge to break destructive patterns, like addictions processes they will be passed
from one generation to the next.  The cycle of destruction can continue, and can be very
complicated to discover the root of the problem.  In this case passing through the light, and the
knowledge of truth according to God’s word it will very often expose dark secrets, or possibly
bring them into the mind of the counselee, and then they can be encouraged to walk through the
process to break free from the bondage that is keeping them imprisoned.

      In the closing argument, it should be addressed that we can walk side by side with
Psychologists in the healing processes of redemption.  As Christians we acknowledge the job is
not complete until Christ can work through the processes that surround the subject  Psychology.  While there are many great discoveries in this field, the Christian counselor fully
understands that complete healing comes from Christ alone, and not secular theories or a
prescription of drugs.  Although these things may temporarily aid the problem, it truly does not
heal and restore the broken soul, nor will it give them the hope of eternity.  It is a great hope that
these fields will come together in their research, and examine the need of spiritual revelation in
helping those through whatever Mental Illness or addiction they may be facing.  The most
important thing of all is to remember that Christ was the most wonderfully powerful Counselor
of all, and that we would strive to model His pattern while working with broken people.

 References

Anderson, Neil T. (2003) Discipleship Counseling: The complete Guide to Helping Others Walk

In Freedom and Grow in Christ. Ventura: Regal Books

Langberg, Diane, PH.D (2011) Trauma as a place of Service: A Traumatized Planet, She’s my

sister, a Bible Society initiative.

McMaken, Bonnie (Mar 7, 2011) Do Our Parents’ Sins Affect Us? Finding healing from

generational hurts and hang-ups.